Stop Playing ‘Victim’

All too often, I see people continue to blame their problems on the world or another external factor. Some of them even have the audacity to think that the world owes them something after everything comes crumbling down on them.

Well, let me be the first to tell you, and hopefully I’m not the first to tell you, that the world owes you nothing. You make or break under your own willpower. Instead of incessantly complaining, “Why me?”, you should be asking yourself, “What can I do to make this situation better? To pick myself up off the ground?”

Those who complain are the ones who keep playing “victim.”  Because they feel uncomfortable with their own anger, they become trapped in a victimized orientation toward life. People who become mired down in feeling victimized tend to view events in their lives as happening to them and feel ineffective and overwhelmed. They also operate on the basic assumption that the world should be fair, which is a child’s way of thinking.

There have been several times in my life where I could’ve just sat there, angry at the world for what it had done to me, given me, and left me in a position leaving me to feel vulnerable. And I’ll admit that there have been a couple times where I’m guilty of doing this.

But if I hadn’t picked myself up off the ground after situations where life had dealt me a bad hand, I definitely wouldn’t be where I am today, nor would I be the person I am today.

One of my favorite lyrics is from Shinedown’s “Sound of Madness,” and it goes, “I created the sound of madness / Wrote the book on pain / Somehow I’m still here to explain / That the darkest hour never comes in the night / You can sleep with a gun / When you gonna wake up and fight?” I feel that the song really resonates with me because I know the whole “I’ve been there” mentality, but I will never understand other peoples’ situations no matter how hard I try to put myself in their shoes.

Nothing will ever be right and life will never be perfect. But if you want to live what you would consider a “perfect life,” it’ll never be easy.

I realize that there are some individuals that feel that nobody understands their situation and that they have no hope. Let me tell you, there is always hope, but it’s up to the individual to find the determination to seek their own definition of a “perfect life.”

Stay strong and never, ever give up.


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